Unification differentiates
Werner Zurfluh
First published in: The fairy-tale-magazine (Die Märchenzeitschrift) Nr.6 1993 - 2nd exp. ed. 1996 in HTML-format
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  • love glows through the cosmos
  • about the misuse of the lucidity and the sexuality
  • 17. January 1979: fading away and dawning of the memory
  • the responsibility awakens with the recollection
  • the green knight, the Château Merveil, and the power-misuse
  • the seduction to the all forgetting pleasure and the loss of the connection to the own roots
  • the offering of the innocence, the price of the awareness and the Amfortas-question
  • you should not remain at a place of forgetting
  • to cancel the non-obligation means to accept memories

Love glows through the cosmos. An expression of this wonderful event is the union of the sexes. Indeed, if the head thinks it must sever itself from the rest of the body, it brings the heart to silence and the instincts become independent. They seize the predominance - or trie it at least - and always lurk in the background on a diminution of the vigilance of the head. With it, the possibility of the reciprocal discovering, which is immanent to the unification, is destroyed. What remains, is a sexuality strictly restricted to the physical and to business-gainful processes. (Contents)

Some psychologists say, that the lucid dreaming and the out-of-body state are not quite harmless. They even warn of going consciously and with full awareness into the nightly events. Therefore I clearly say: It is about in no way to oversee directly the lucid dreams and the out-of-body state, and to influence them after own discretion! Sometimes an intervention of the awareness is necessary. To prevent a fight for example. A lucid dreamer begins instead of this a conversation with the aggressive dream-figure. But if the I as an Ego - thanks to the awareness and the opinion «it's only a dream» - intends to dominate the sequence of events, the trip into the other-world will fail. - Actually, the issue is quite complicate because of the possibility to sexual relationships (also) in lucid dreaming and the out-of-body state. But it can not be managed in that consciousness is denied to the person. Especially the sexuality is a big challenge on all levels and offers the opportunity to the breakthrough to a conscious and true love. It would even be thoughtless to attribute everything to an 'inner director' and to give up the lucidity at the moment when the physical body falls asleep.

First perhaps, at the lucid dreaming fascinates mostly the possibility of the fulfillment of own wishes (sex, power, magic, adventures). Stephen LaBerge wrote in «Lucid Dreaming - The power of Being Awake and Aware in your Dream»:

«Yet after too many 'wish-fulfilling' dreams, where the action is motivated by the ego-associated drives, passions, desires, expectations, and goals with which we are so familiar, a point of satiation may be reached. Lucid dreamers may then tire of seeking their habitual satisfactions, which may have become less satisfying owing to their effortless gratification. They grow weary of dreaming the same dreams, and equally of being the same self, on night after night. It is at this point that the need for self-transcendence may arise. Such lucid dreamers no longer know what they want, only that it is not what they formerly wanted. So they give up deciding what to do, and resign from deliberate dream control.» (Ann.1)

Because of the continuity of the consciousness, it was always relatively easy for me in the so-called dream-condition to realize the own sexual wishes - indeed with the result, that I lost the consciousness during the sexual intercourse when on out-of-body excursions into other-world realms! Therefore I had to realize, that it is absolutely necessary, not to follow stubbornly the own inclinations, and simply to think, the dream-scenery can be used at will for the satisfaction of the own sexual wishes and other egoistic ideas. Whoever does so, learns in fact, that there is neither dream-distortion nor dream-censorship. However, with an exclusive 'wish-fulfilling' in dreams, one refuses the personal responsibility. Furthermore, one misses the opportunity to unification, because the fact is disregarded, that sexuality as a connective strength encloses soul and spirit! (Contents)

Le Château Merveil
17. January 1979:

After falling asleep, I immediately come into a sexual field, in which my wife is also involved. Cohabitation is quite natural here, but not the most important thing. Tender touches alternate with nestling and touching, caressing and deep kisses. This is a very pleasant activity, that seems timeless! Because of the very satisfying sensations, I feel absolutely no desire to stop with it. It is immensely easy for me to remain in the event. The ongoing change of the unknown and very pretty women is stimulating. Sometimes I become conscious of the situation, but mostly I let pass these moments - why should I strain myself? What could I do otherwise? The events make me completely satisfied and happy. No arduous performance is demanded in direction of an expansion of the awareness. Always other and very appealing women appear. A mere thought suffices - or the concentrated contemplation of a picture. - Softly dies the memory away and quietly dawns the forgetting.

Despite the joys and their outstanding preferences I become plainly conscious of the situation and realize - at least at the edge and hardly tangible - that another reminiscence begins to glimmer. Namely, that an eternal forgetting begins to suck me up slowly at this place! It seems not fair to leave myself to this fading away. What kind of reasons that may be, I don't know, because I can not remember them. Nevertheless it is clear, that it can not be right to linger here. That worries me more and more! I even get a bad conscience. That has immediately effects on the happening. It becomes somehow more 'resinous'. No longer it works so properly with the women, because the picture-evokings don't operate smoothly and the meetings fade. On the other hand, that has a positive feedback-effect on the memory. By it, my bad conscience is increased. In order to hold the situation, it needs even more efforts. But exactly this intervention falsifies them visibly. This has the consequence, that I remember even more exactly - and my unrest gains further.

Nevertheless I succeed to come back to the 'old' situation for a relatively long time. But then I finally realize, that I have actively to decide! Should I remain here and forget everything? Or should I go and remind me again! The decision is unspeakably hard for me, because I have to leave a really heavenly condition and must go out into an unknown world of unpredictable events. There will be no 'safety' outdoors! In a world beyond these realms dominates quite another type of Eros. Not this wonderful type, in which I was softly trapped during hours. Or - how long was it actually? Were it days, years, months, or even decades?

I finally determine to leave the blissful event - with tears in the eyes, penetrated with pain, and full of agony. It is especially interesting, that the recollection of my loved wife helps me, to accomplish this decision. She actually is the woman, to whom my affection is valid in an outstanding amount - also on the bodily-sexual level. With the promise of the marriage we have given us a right on exclusivity of physical unification! - Exactly this memory is a powerful help for me to go away. I recognize for the first time, what marriage actually means. (Contents)

Furthermore, I see, that it is the marriage (in any form, also in a not institutionalized), which calls the other back to mind - and with the memory the feeling for responsibility. It focuses sexuality on a single partner and brings the relationship to development over time and space, and over the purely physical. Physical sexuality limits itself in form of the marriage on a single partner in the material world. This limitation is voluntarily and has an effect on all levels - also on the mental-spiritual. And it allows a "vertical pulling through" of the monogamous marriage on other levels of experience. By it, the memory is strengthened decisively beyond the everyday-life in the dream-state. And this has effects on the maintenance of the continuity of the awareness and with it the lucidity. That is an very interesting aspect of the marriage - I think. Promiscuity would be synonymous with forgetting, marriage with memory, love with mutual knowledge!

Did Parcival - I consider it as an option - fail because he did not marry? He had to leave the earth without connecting the grail with the world of everyday-life. Possibly he did not procure an essential proof. Perhaps he never gave a vow in form of the marriage-ring. For him, exactly such a ring could have been a factor of 'invariability' and a connection between the different levels.

How for example the quartz has enabled certain shamans to remain lucid on their trip into the upper- and underworld. - Merely to leave 'le Château Merveil' seems not to suffice. It is also required to draw the consequences, to enter a marriage conceivably, and to maintain the fidelity!

Therefore I get out and awake in the bed. I do this transition consciously. I leave the dream-level and slip into the sleeping physical body. (Contents)

The willful and conscious down-climbing
The just described experience is connected with the Château Merveil of the Green Knight and the gallantries of those realms:

It was in the night of a New Year's Eve when the Green Knight came to the round-table. He was a horrible and giant-shaped man, and he asked the present to their horror to knock off his head! Under all the knights, Gawan was the only one, who dared to fulfill the uncanny challenge. King Artus' courageous nephew had to promise before beheading the Green Knight to appear over the year in his Green Chapel. The Green Knight lifted the knocked off head and placed it again easily in the right position. Gawan redeemed his promise and reached on his quest a palace, 'le Château Merveil', in which he had to pass some gallant adventures. (Ann.2)

This Château Merveil is an odd castle. It possibly has to do with the 'castellum of the cork-oaks', 'Kalaat-el-Ballut' (Caltabellotta) on Sicily (Ann.3), that Wolfram von Eschenbach describes in the story of Parcival (XIII/913) as 'Kalot - Embolot'. There, the wizard Klinschor imprisoned over 400 women. On the castle, the occult was practiced, the women were prostituted, and the clairvoyance was abused. All this has to do with becoming conscious, the awareness and the lucidity, and is a problem of power and power-misuse. (Contents)

The Green Knight is - as Heinrich Zimmer said - nobody other than 'reaper death'. His enchanting beautiful woman gives the goblet of desire and tempts - like Mârâs charming and lovely daughters - to the all forgetting pleasure. (Ann.4)

If an alive structure cuts arbitrarily its own roots, the feedback to the basis of its existence is lost. There can be no partnership with the surroundings, because the touch-points are missing. The temptations of life, that encircle the person, overthrow the lucidity sometimes with egocentric forgetting. An event like that on the 'Venus-Mountain' is - the experience of the 17. January 1979 shows it - truly very attractiv and comely - and therefore extremely seductive. Whoever leaves too compliant to a pleasure-seeking action is in danger to fall asleep and so to lose the awareness and the memory - in the truest sense of the word. In consequence the life in a partnership impoverishes and withers. That my wife was also involved with this nightly trip, shows, that in principle for the woman exists the same danger.

Those, who stay in the palace of the miracles for ever, can live in it throughout safely, happy, and contentedly. However, because they forget little by little, the memory fades away and there are no possibilities any more to compare the present with the past, that would allow to recognize the wonderful as such. Then, the life on the Venus-Mountain is neither awful nor unpleasant and neither good nor evil. There are no obligations and not the lowest responsibility oppresses. A really lighthearted and naive bantering happens in all innocence and far from each time! It is a curious contacting and touching without any obligation, a pleasant rubbing together and an intimate loving up! A joy of captivating and trivial beauty, of blowing away perfumes and pleasant odors. Everything is wrapped by a softly-dim light. Most splendid colors and forms refresh the eye! The delight is transparent, extravagant the beatitude, indescribably the aesthetic pleasure! What else can be the wish of a man or a woman? It is easy to realize the personal wishes and ideas immediately (this has to do with the problem of the 'ideoplastic forming' as an occult practice) - until one exhausts in the absent-mindedness, that knows no You! (Contents)

Shouldn't such a beatitude suffice? That is really a hard question? Is there actually a reason, not to be happy with this shadowless satisfaction. Is it desirable and necessary at all, to leave an eleusic and heavenly world? Or is a person mistaken by believing to be immaculate merely because he or she lives easily in a world without intrigue and wickedness, in which neither arrogance nor power becomes visible? Is innocence guaranteed simply because a decision is avoided? Probably not!

If the continuity of consciousness, the awareness, is accepted as a significant part of the creation, the knowledge of opposites becomes an acute and dynamic challenge. If the step through the narrow gate into the other-world (where ever it may be) is refused, the person remains for all eternity jammed in the mother-lap as a kind of folding-rock. One remains in a creationless area, where it is not possible to come together, and gets stuck in the uneventful-ness! Therefore, all must leave "The Palace of Women", 'le Château Merveil', voluntarily, because otherwise it turns into a self-masoned prison. Going outside is synonymous with a birth into the world and the creation-process - but that is the price to become conscious definitely and to maintain the awareness! I wonder indeed, if consciousness justifies this price. An answer gives only the memory - but that on the other hand demands awareness. Comes the clarity of consciousness together with the memory, then a merely circular process unlocks to the spiral, with which is opened beside the personal the capacity of humanity. Nothing can be repressed any more, otherwise consciousness and memory remain partially and fragmentary. - Anytime, birth proves to be a difficult venture!

Beside the miracles of 'le Château Merveil' will emerge in the memory for example the question after the wound of 'Amfortas' - and with it the question after the compassion. Because the bare fondness to unification doesn't suffice. Love is more than merely a delightful coitus, but - like Pierre Teilhard de Chardin says - «to recover and accomplish oneself in another». (Ann.5) (Contents)

The loving asking
For me, at the 17. January, it was already during the bliss-full event plainly clear, that a place of forgetting is no place of staying and sojourning, because - sooner or later - it will be overshadowed by unloving and mercilessness and only can be retained as a property under use of most brutal power! To stay at this place was no solution and shamefully, because it would be irresponsible and inhuman, to pause in isolation and encapsulation. Meanwhile, other people remain outside in the world in their pain and ailment.

Whoever doesn't ask the question after the specific situation of a creature, damns it to an ahistorical being! With the silence, a communication is refused, a dividing denied, and each form of sympathy excluded! Only this way, the own condition can be retained in all complacency. Salvation has only an end in itself. Without sympathy, it comes to alienation and separation of the co-creatures and finally to limitation and isolation! Unconditional love is not granted, an extensive knowledge about the personnel existence of the partner is refused. Caring and mutual sensitization through love and with love has perished. Without love, i.e. without mutual attraction, the person is alienated from the cosmic feeling and tenderness. One falls into unconnectedness and with it into darkness, cold and ignorance.

Eroticism on a bare egoistic level demands the total forgetting. Only this enables an absolute memoryless condition, in which the interactions, which are possible with sexuality (and with it the cohabitation) can be disregarded. Such a loss of the memory is an extremely active accomplishment, that necessitates - like each repression - much energy . Something like that can only happen 'against better knowledge' and 'against the spirit'. Love strives for an unification on all levels (horizontally) and through all levels (vertically). This is often prevented fully conscious. Sometimes even because the material level is set absolutely and/or the sexual is turned exclusively as a survival factor.

Now because of the physical component it is very easy for the love, to remain open for the mental-spiritual dimensions of the partner with all the memories. The aging of the body belongs also to it, and the love has always the strength, to transcent the merely material sexuality and to include the spiritual. (Contents)

It was extraordinarily difficult for me on the 'Island of Women' (a type of an 'empire of the mothers' and with it a 'mother-lap', but also an 'empire of eternal youth and stagnation') to give a clear cancellation to forgetting and to freedom from obligation in relationships. It was very hard for me to accept the memory and with it the knowledge and the continuity of consciousness (the lucidity). I went consciously out and didn't succumb to the luring temptation of eternal forgetting and selective reminding. No matter - an essential question nevertheless remained unanswered! What does actually bring the down-climbing of the 'Venus-Mountain' besides ailments and pains? - Once again, an answer gives only the love!

The mystery of the mortal body and the transient individuality, that «is assembled of desire and fear» (Ann.6), obviously contains also the question after the willingness of allowing the memories to arise. The treasure of eternal life contains memory-contents, which include the world of the everyday life as well as other realms. Indeed, these are swept away by fear or desire. The respective other world will be forgotten in the dance of egoistic endeavor! In everyday life, the memory at the nightly experiences may be buried, in the realm beyond the threshold is the world of the everyday life covered by ignorance. If however no memory is over there of the everyday life, and on this side of the other side, everything is lost and there will be no conscious reincarnation. And exactly that applies on that sexual event, that doesn't serve the reciprocal recognizing, but only has one goal: the egoistic satisfaction or type-conservation. If the sexual-act does not allow the pacifying of two separated essences in a mystic oneness, but is striving to exploit of the other for the purpose of increasing egoistic desires, the mystery of the sexuality fades to irrelevance. Whoever refuses the memory, is guilty, when memory would be possible.

When two different beings meet, who are connected with a bond of love flowed around their natures, these two are joined and united. The systems were separated before. But with the unification they open mutually and grow together in a wonderful manner to a new structure, whose qualities could not be foreseen or calculated. Sometimes a child originates from the union as a fruit of the body - so to speak as an external expression of the event and as biological visualization of the mental-spiritual event. A few probably need this materialization in order to bode a little bit at least what love can achieve. Love allows through sexuality a lighting up of the material level and makes it shining through. The levels ar now vertically permeable, and light streams through them (and with it consciousness and awareness). The partners become more complex and differentiate in the union, because they know about themselves and the other - and the united. (Contents)


Ann. 1: Stephen LaBerge of the Lucidity Institute sent me kindly the original text! «The Lucidity Institute is dedicated to the advancement of research on the nature and potentials of consciousness and to the application of the results of this research to the enhancement of human health and well-being.»

In the "Lucidity Institute Catalog" is something written, that can be seen in the context with a principal apriori decision, namely:
"Lucid dreams are dreams in which you know that you are dreaming, and are aware that the dream is your own creation."

My opinion is, that a (lucid) dream or an OOBE is not only a purerly 'own creation', a creation only of the subject, but depends as well on the objective. It is in the long term more appropriate (at least I had to learn it) to consider a dream-event as an 'amalgam', which is subject to that, what Arthur Stanley Eddington calls the 'Selective Subjectivism': Nobody is able to separate clearly the subjective from the objective. This approach, which is valid in quantum mechanics and relativity-theory, is also reasonable for (lucid) dreams and OOBEs. Like everything, the events are not only the creation of a 'dreamer', but they are a mixture of subjective and objective 'materials'. The 'dreamers' are the co-creators of a 'nightly experience' during the dream- and the OOB-state. They live in a 'non-material' reality-area. If they are lucid, it is especially important for them to accept a possibly objective portion and to behave at least as if could be objective!

In the article 'OTHER WORLDS: OUT-OF-BODY EXPERIENCES AND LUCID DREAMS' Lynne Levitan and Stephen LaBerge write: «Spiritual teachings tell us that we have a reality beyond that of this world. The OBE may not be, as it is easily interpreted, a literal separation of the soul from the crude physical body, but it is an indication of the vastness of the potential that lies wholly within our minds. The worlds we create in dreams and OBEs are as real as this one, and yet hold infinitely more variety. ... Freed of the constraints imposed by physical life, expanded by awareness that limits can be transcended, who knows what we could be, or become?»

Instead of "the worlds we create in dreams and OBEs" I would say "the worlds we co-create in dreams and OBEs", because of the 'selective subjectivism'. Lucid dreamers can react rather adequate to the situation, when they assume a reality beyond that of this (material) world and behave as if there is an objective part.
(end of Ann.1 - back to text)

Ann. 2: Cf. Heinrich Zimmer, Abenteuer und Fahrten der Seele, Zürich: Rascher, (1948) 1961:79-104).
Ann. 4: p. 87.
Ann. 6: p. 89.
end of Ann.2 - back to text)
(end of Ann.4 - back to text)
(end of Ann.6 - back to text)

Ann. 3: Cf. Hans Gsänger, Sizilien - Insel des Kain, Freiburg i.B.: Die Kommenden, 2. Auflg. 1968:110-138.
end of Ann.5 back to text
Ann. 5: Pierre Teilhard de Chardin, Zukunft des Menschen, Olten: Walter, (1959) 1963:125.
end of Ann.5 back to text
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Mai 1996
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